The How to Get Rid of Things Blog

As a sort of warm up drill for the writing I’m going to be doing for my thesis in a moment here, I decided to write an article that I think a lot of you are going to find useful on a particular day in the very near future:  How to Get Rid of Trick-or-Treaters. That’s right. We’ve got all the advice you need (if you want to end up in jail) for getting rid of trick or treaters, or at least convincing their parents to slowly back away from your porch. You’ll find this article in the satire section of the website.

Are you wanting to know what to do with all of those leaves in your yard? Is the prospect of raking an acre of leaves into little piles that just sit around waiting to be picked up not at the top of your to-do list? Well, you’re in luck. I just wrote an article about how to get rid of autumn leaves you’re sure to find helpful. [Editor’s note: do not actually do anything suggested in this article.] Failure to heed that warning will surely end up in your arrest and subsequent appearance on the local news.