Well I just got over a rather nasty virus infection in my intestines. For those of you who might wonder where I got something like that: my money is on a certain pork fajita burrito they make at Chipotle, or the person who made it. But it’s hard to tell where you get these sort of viruses. The variables are almost infinite, so it’s not worth bothering about, and most people drop the subject altogether when the those cramps hit them and all they want to do is sleep on the bathroom floor for a week. So, what did I do? I wrote an article about how to get rid of gastroenteritis, the stomach flu.

It’s mostly a bunch of poop jokes. Just kidding.