As a sort of warm up drill for the writing I’m going to be doing for my thesis in a moment here, I decided to write an article that I think a lot of you are going to find useful on a particular day in the very near future:  How to Get Rid of Trick-or-Treaters. That’s right. We’ve got all the advice you need (if you want to end up in jail) for getting rid of trick or treaters, or at least convincing their parents to slowly back away from your porch. You’ll find this article in the satire section of the website.